With the arrival of Erin (hereto after referred to as, “The Woman”) my fleet of automobiles has grown by 100%.  Not only do I now possess the fantastically silver (and possibly flaming) silver VW Jetta, I now have in my possession a blue 4 cylinder Ford Escape.  This low acceleration having SUV was the perfect addition to my cadre of cars.  As Atomic would say, thanks to the Transitive Property, I now possess the ability to transport large items including but not limited to: Kegorators, push lawn mowers, dead hookers.  While many of you out there in “Green Land” are probably aghast at my excitement at gaining a gas exhausting SUV, to you I say, how many dead hookers can you transport in your Prius?  I rest my case.

Chris Risner


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